Bye Liverpool

Well we have had a brilliant trip to Liverpool. I am so glad to be home though. That train journey home is mad.

Tuesday we decided to go for a walk around the shops. We hit the water front first and I dragged Tasha and Kira up the Freij wheel on the docks. I didn’t realise Tash has a thing about heights, same as our pal Nicola so it must be love if she allowed me to drag her up the wheel lol

So after the wheel we went for a wander around the shops. I went a tad mad in Primark. In my defence, I had to get Scarlett a whole wardrobe for nursery. When I registered her they said that whilst they do their best to ensure their clothes remain relatively mess-free, they cannot guarantee it and one nursery worker told me to go in to Primark for its cheapness. Because as she point out, I’m less likely to worry if she’s wearing something from Primark and crawls through paint or gets her dinner down herself than I would if it was “nicer” clothes. She had a point. So I spent about £80 in there. I got 9-12 months as their sizes always come up smaller so it won’t be long before she’s wearing them even though she’s small and not even 8 months yet lol

We went for dinner again that night at the same place. The whetherspoons. We didn’t see our “mate” again lol

Wednesday we were due to meet the Liverpool girlies (hence the point of travelling all that way). Scarlett was napping after her feed so I left her to sleep then when she woke we grabbed our stuff and left. Tasha had said Kira was being a little madam so she wanted her to kip and she’d meet me there as soon as she was awake. I was only 20 minutes late and Tasha was 20 minutes behind me. I had a nice chat to all the ladies and cooed over their babies. Scarlett went to a few ladies for a cuddle. We went our separate ways after everyone had finished eating. I barely ate because the food wasn’t the kind I eat (fussy eater, right here). We wandered and then took the girls up Radio City Tower. It’s basically a radio hub that’s very high up and you can see for miles. So we did that.

We ended up having dinner in pizza expresss in Liverpool One shopping centre. We decided that another meal at Whetherspoons was a bit much lol I had dough balls and garlic bread. I didn’t fancy pizza although Tasha’s pizza did look lush.

Tasha left that night. Her other half picked her and Kira up.

I booked our train ticket home. It was £49 and we had to be on the designated train at that specific time. We missed the train by 10 freaking minutes. All because we got a bit lost trying to get the merseryrail from Moorfield to Lime Street. So I had to fork it £93 and then wait an hour. So I fed Scarlett then she had a nap.

When the virgin fast train got to Euston I desperately needed a wee so I paid 30p (travesty, why should I pay for a bodily function that I cannot control) and had to take Scarlett with me. There was no signs for baby change (would’ve been easier as bigger room/stall) so took her in normal ladies toilets. In her stroller. Couldn’t close toilet door with her in the way but couldn’t risk (obvs) leaving her outside it so I peed with the door open. Then when I came back out a guard had a go because I’d abandoned the suitcase. Even though I tried to explain that 1) I had to because I couldn’t wheel EVERYTHING into the ladies toilets, 2) I had had to take my baby with me in to the ladies as there was no baby change and therefore everything was made harder and 3) I didn’t see him there 10 minutes previous when I was struggling. I was so annoyed at him.

We finally got home and I was so pleased. Scarlett had missed her nanny and I missed home comforts.

Scarlett is in bed and so am I now.

Can’t believe it’s September already. Where has the time gone?


31 weeks in Liverpool

Well we made it. To Liverpool. I won’t lie, the trip was exhausting and worked for TFL are such knobs. Like, the website says if you need help then ask, I ask and all I get is “I can’t leave my post”. Okay thanks you dick. I’ll just struggle with a suitcase, stroller and a 7 month old down an escalator because, even though it is illegal, there is NO ACCESSIBILITY for disabled people (like a lift) in the damn station. And I have no choice but to use the tube to get to Euston for the Virgin Train to Liverpool.

Anyway we got the train from Waterloo. It was packed. Very packed for 11:30am. If we had been travelling really early, during peak times, I would expect it to be busy but not at that time. I didn’t have a seat. We got on the tube to Euston. What I had to do was put Scarlett in the baby carrier on the chest, collapse the stroller down then wheel both the stroller and our suitcase on to the tube. At Euston there was NO accessibility whatsoever (whereas Waterloo has lifts down to the level above the tube, and only 1 small flight of steps down to the tube – doable). So I stuck the stroller in front of me and dragged the suitcase behind me when I hopped on the escalator to take us up to the main station for our connecting train to Liverpool. It turns out the Virgin fast trains make me sick. I get motion sickness, always have, but it usually only occurs in cars if I get hot. The train swayed, a lot. So I felt sick for the entire 2 hours and 10 minute journey. I am SO thankful that Scarlett is a brilliant baby or I would not have coped.

We arrived at Liverpool Lime Street station at 15:21 as planned. We got on the merseyrail (tube) to Central then another to Moorfields. I bumped in to Steph (from my pregnancy group) when I got off at Moorfields. She was getting out the tube lift as we were getting on. We walked round the station and the Premier Inn was right there. I could not have picked a better hotel. I love Premier Inns. We checked in, got up to our room and settled in.

My friend Tasha, from my pregnancy group, was next door (how weird we were placed next to each other) so I took Scarlett in to say Hi. Her and Kira were beating each other up lol we decided we would feed the two girls, let them nap if need be then we’d set off to find somewhere to eat.

We eventually settled on a Wetherspoons but we weren’t sure where it was situated so after we left the hotel and got to the end of the road we stopped to look on our phone maps. A guy was stood outside the pub next to us and he struck up a conversation. He was “awwwing” over the girls (like obvs, they are cute AF) then he asked us where we were going etc. In the end he offered to show us the nearest Wetherspoons. He proceeded to walk us to it, take us inside and get us a table. He was friendly enough but I think he only helped because he was looking to cop off. He tried Tasha first, asked for her number haha then he tried me. His name was Joe and apparently he has 5 kids!!

We had dinner and then we set off. We were still laughing about our escort. We stopped off at the Tesco’s express store next to the Premier Inn for munchies and I accidentally stole 2 redbulls and some washing up liquid. I had placed them on the top of the stroller, and forgot about them when I went through the self service check out. I didn’t even notice until we had left the shop and Tasha was like “did you pay for them?” I was like “Oh, no, keep walking” haha

Scarlett and I FaceTimed Brett before she went to bed. She gets mad excited when she hears the connecting tone before he pops up on the screen and talks to her. It is beyond cute.

I am in bed watching some tele on my iPad. Scarlett is in bed. I think Tasha and me are taking the girls to the Freij Wheel on the docks and then for some shopping.

I can’t believe we made it to Liverpool. I am so proud of us both for making the journey. I love travelling but I won’t lie, it IS harder with a baby regardless of how good the baby is.


Finally home

Omg worst weekend. Literally had no sleep due to Brett’s dog constantly barking which kept waking Scarlett up. Then in the day she struggled to get a nap for the same reasons so I had to take her out in the pram for some damn peace.

Brett worked Friday so we went to the park. He got home just after 5. We had gone to the park for the afternoon. We found a big tree so we could sit in the shade on a blanket. It was a nice afternoon just us two. Scarlett was very happy to see him. He sorted some dinner. I got Scarlett ready for bed and then we ate. I put her to bed. Brett fell asleep on the sofa in the lounge after we naughtily took advantage of having a free house. He was on the sofa naked and I tried to wake him but he wouldn’t so I just got into bed. It was late. He came in the bedroom a few hours later and woke me up. Soon after Scarlett was woke up. Again. So I had to sort her out. Didn’t end up going back to sleep for ages. Then I was up with her early again. I was getting so ratty from lack of sleep at this point.

He had pre-arranged plans to go paint balling with his friends so he got picked up just after 8. Scarlett was on the flor crawling towards to me, his dog was about 2 foot away and for no reason he suddenly went for her so I snatched her up and the bastard tried to go for me. I fucking hate that dog. I was so angry and the lack of sleep was driving me insane that I just flung Scarlett on my hip and stormed out of the living room slamming the door behind me. The dog started barking because god forbid you shut him in. I sat on the step in the garden with her whilst I calmed down. I knew I could no longer let her crawl if he was in the room so I decided to take her out again to get some peace, and hopefully nap. So we got in the pram and off we went. We were no more than a minute from his house and she was flat out asleep. So when we passed a bench I sat down, parked her next to me and let her sleep to hearts content whilst I played a game on my iPad. When she woke we walked to the park and sat under the tree (same as the day before).

We stayed in the park until 5 then we walked back so I could feed her. Brett was back at 4pm so he had had an hour to himself before we came back. Again he fell asleep really early. He was flat out on the bed by 10:30pm. Second night in a row he’d missed his shower/bath. He woke up at 3:30am and woke me up. Thanks! I got up with Scarlett and left him to sleep in. I woke him and he wasn’t amused. It took all my energy (I barely had any at that point) not to scream at him “are you for real motherfucker?” I didn’t and I’m very proud lol

I settled on getting a rail replacement bus from Hackbridge to Streatham Common. Then I’d get a train to Clapham junction then home. So that’s what I did. On the bus at 15:05 and we arrived home at 16:30.  I was so glad to be home. Scarlett was glad too. She had missed her nanny.

Scarlett is in bed asleep and I’m in bed myself. We have a busy day tomorrow. We are due on the train at 11:30am for Liverpool. I can’t wait to get there.

I did lots of washing when I got home so I could pack. But it’s all done now. Just need to put in any last minute bits.


25 today!

It’s my birthday. It’s my birthday. It’s my birthday. It’s my birthday. It’s my fucking birthday!!!!!!!

So yeah I’m 25 haha I gave Scarlett the birthday card she got me, so she could “give it” to me. Gosh she’s so adorable I could squish her!

We got up, I fed her some bottle. She plays with it lol so we got dressed and we left for the train. We literally made the train with 30 seconds to spare!

35 minutes later and we were in Waterloo station and speed walking to meet Nicola and Matilda. We met and decided to walk to one of the restaurants on the road leading to the London Eye. So we grabbed a drink in All Bar One whilst Matilda had her bottle. I had a good long hold of her and she decided to vom on my shirt lol I was like thanks for that missy. After a nappy change we made our way over to the London Eye. After faffing in the queue, and me realising I had to queue elsewhere to pick up my ticket as I had inadvertently not selected “e-ticket”, we finally got in one of the pods. The babies were absolutely brilliant. We could not fault them at all. We took lots of pictures, let them sit and stand etc before we finally departed to find some food.

We walked back to the place we were before but ended up next door in the Slug & Lettuce. The girls were napping so we ordered a drink and had a good old natter then we ordered some food. We both went for a chicken burger. It wasn’t half bad. It was chargrilled. The girls woke up when we were eating (fancy that). Scarlett had her bottle then I finished eating and got her out. We took some more pictures then at 3:45 we decided to make a move towards the station as neither of us fancied travelling in rush hour (5-7pm). We walked to the station and I walked them both to the lift down to the underground. Scarlett was asleep by then but Matilda was awake so I said goodbye then I hugged Nicola and off she went.

Our train was scheduled for 4:49pm and it was 4:20pm by then so I found the platform and got on the train as it was waiting there already. I got a seat this time as I ran and sat in the disabled carriage (more room). We got off the train the other end at 5:15pm, jumped on a bus at 5:45 and were home just after 6pm. Scarlett was knackered but she was super excited to see her nanny and uncle Jordy.

She had some of her last feed then she had a bath. We shared. Then mom got her out and dressed her whilst I washed my hair. She drank the rest of her bottle and was in bed asleep by 9pm. She’s such a good little human!!!

We had a fab day. I am so thankful to Nicola for coming with me because she’s scared of friggin heights (and for those that don’t know, the London Eye is sky high). So it must be love for her to do that lol #TrueLoveWins #BestiesFo’LifeMotherfucker ;)

I am 25. I have a beautiful daughter, a sexy man (who I wouldn’t change even when he’s being an ass) and a lovely family (mostly). What more could I want? Alcohol, that’s what I  want. So glad I’m having a party on Saturday. Love a reason to get dressed up and natter with peeps I haven’t seen in a long time. Looking forward to it. Plus I can show off both my daughter (not everyone has met her) and my boyfriend (being single for 4 years previous made me realise I missed having someone to share things with, I’m so glad I met Brett).

I’m in bed trying to watch the new Batman V Superman movie but I just can’t seem to get in to it! Oh dear!


1 week to go

Tuesday morning Scarlett woke up at 7ish. She had her bottle then she went back to sleep. I hadn’t paid for breakfast nor brought anything prepared so I just ate a few cookies I’d bought and had a cup of tea. I gave her down breakfast when she woke and she got it everywhere so I bathed her quickly then dressed her. Dressed myself then packed up and we checked out. We walked back up to the station so we could walk in to the shopping centre. It’s massive.

We met Stephanie and Sophie at the station then we waited for Gina and Sarah. Tasha wasn’t due to arrive till 1pm so once Sarah arrived we walked back to the shopping centre to find a café. Originally we’d said John Lewis but none of us knew where it was so we ended up sitting in the open plan part of a place called Muffin Break.

Gina is Laila’s mom and Laila really took to me, and Scarlett. We sat both the babies on the table together and Laila kept grabbing Scarlett’s top and Scarlett kept looking at her like “wtf are you doing?” Haha

Stephanie is Erin’s mom. Erin and Scarlett are birthday buddies but you wouldn’t believe it. Erin is huge. Scarlett was actually born first lol

Sophie is Henry’s mom. He was the only boy until Rachel arrived with Theo. He was born the day after Valentine’s Day. So he’s younger than Scarlett, Erin, Kira, Isla and Aislinn-Rose

Sarah is Isla’s mom. Isla is 2 days older than Erin and Scarlett. I got a smile off her which is an achievement because her nickname by her mom is angry little elf lol love her though.

Tasha is Kira’s mom and they arrived when I was in muffin break getting something to eat and drink. Kira was originally scheduled to arrive January 25th by planned c-section but had to come 3 days early on January 22nd. She’s a proper cheeky girl. I was talking to her and she was grinning at me.

Roisin is Aislinn-Rose’s mom. She is younger than Erin, Scarlett, Kira and Isla. But is older than Henry and Theo.

Eventually Rachel turned up with Theo. They had had baby sensory so that’s why they were later than everyone else. Theo was born late February so he was the youngest baby but he is a big boy. Very smiley too.

We stayed where we were until about 3pm then we wandered downstairs to the Disney store. I spent £90 on stuff for Scarlett for Christmas. Probably unnecessary but fuck it, it’s her first Christmas. Stephanie and Sophie left to catch their train. I thought they said all of the girls were going so I was a bit annoyed so I paid and stomped out the shop. Tasha called me and I whipped round realising Sarah, Rachel and Tasha were still there. I must’ve looked like a mad woman marching out swinging my pink princess bag. We walked to the station to catch our trains. Tasha and I were on the same platform but going in opposite directions. She missed her train by seconds so she left for another one on a different platform.

Our journey home wasn’t bad but national rail lied about there being a lift down at Euston to the tube. There was an escalator. A TFL lady helped me. Then at Waterloo there is about 15 steps to get from the underground to the next level where the lift is. Two very friendly London commuters helped me with the pram. Very grateful for nice people.

The last leg of our journey was a direct train from Waterloo. About 20 minutes from home our train stopped due to some fault on the track. The carriage we were in had just 2 people in and lots of floor space so I let Scarlett crawl around the floor for a bit. We got off the train finally. And then we were home!!!

We had a brilliant trip even if it was long as assholes and I had a banging headache when we got back. Nothing a little paracemtol and a good nights sleep couldn’t fix.

Wednesday I put Scarlett in her cot sat up playing whilst I did some stuff and caught her stood up. Even though we moved the mattress down 1 setting after we caught her stood up last time. She’s a nightmare.

Thursday (today) we sorted out the downstairs. We cleared out the fireplace (we don’t use it so it was filled with junk) and mom screwed the fire guard on to the wall incase Scarlett uses it to stand up and it topples on top of her. Now it’s secure it won’t move if she does try. And she probably will because she’s a monkey!

She got caught going in Nana’s fireplace. All of her grandchildren have touched it at one point, just out of curiosity. My child decided to grab the metal bar at the front and lick it. Yum lol

My birthday is in a week. I’m going to do my annoying daily countdown on here like I normally do. So today is “1 week to go”. Brett isn’t coming down until next Friday so he technically misses my birthday but he’s still here for the weekend, and be party. Which is fine. I want to spend my birthday going up the London eye with Scarlett so I’ll just take her on my own now. I don’t mind.

We are visiting a nursery tomorrow and going in to my work for our monthly visit.


New Week

We had a bit of an awkward weekend. As I mentioned in my previous post: Brett got told an hour before we arrived that a member of his family, who has been sick for a while, has taken a turn for the worst. So he spent a lot of the weekend visiting that family member. Which is totally understandable. And I was fine with that, obvs. But it made me feel really awkward rattling around his house by my lonesome. Not quite lonesome as such, as his foster brother was there too but he is 12 and doesn’t know me so he was in his room playing PS3 the entire time. So I basically had Brett’s house to myself and that was just plain weird.

Saturday Brett went to visit his sick family member again. He left at 1ish. I made myself a sandwich then I grabbed his house key and off we went to the park. I walked around a bit, fed Scarlett whilst watching the ducks fighting the swans and geese. I let her sit on my lap and nose around. She quite enjoyed watching the birds on the water. It started to rain at about 4 so we headed back. I stuck the tele on and we hanged out. She started getting tired for her usual 5pm nap so I took her into Brett’s room and we laid on his bed for a bit. She slept for maybe half hour or so. Brett came back and said he would sort dinner. He took Scarlett up for a bath then I watched her whilst he had a shower. Then he watched her whilst I had a shower. I got her to sleep after a feed and she was laid on his bed flat out. He didn’t end up sorting dinner till 9pm. I was starving as I had lunch 8 hours ago!! Scarlett woke up whilst we was eating and it took an hour to get her back to sleep. Once she was off we watched a film. It was pretty good. It was called The Sweeney. We got into bed and were both asleep about an hour later. I was knackered, I needed the sleep.

Sunday (today) Scarlett woke up just before 7am. I left her in the pram top whilst I sorted her bottle. I could hear her proper crying. I knew Brett wouldn’t ignore her but she was still screaming so I went to in to pick her up. He had picked her up and was trying to soothe her but she just was not having any of it. I finished sorting her bottle and he fed her. She only drank a few ounces then she fell asleep. We put her back in her bed then we made the most of her sleeping and his morning glory lol then we both went back to sleep.


My two loves

She woke up again at 11ish so I grabbed her and took her to the kitchen with me so I could make her bottle. I didn’t want her to wake Brett up. He likes his sleep and he been up with her at 7am for a change. So I let him sleep. I sorted her and then we sat in the lounge. Brett’s mom took her whilst I had some toast then I got her dressed. She needed a nap so I let her sleep. She wanted a feed and I wanted it out of the way before we had dinner then left for the train so at half 2 I fed her 4oz. Then we ate our roast dinner. I collected all our stuff from around Brett’s house then he walked us to the train station.

She started to get really grumpy on the train from Clapham to Home. She was tired and it WAS 5pm so she wanted her usual nap. So I cuddled her and she fell asleep 20 minutes before we got off. Mom picked us up and she woke up in the car. I knew she was due a feed so I gave her 1/4 of the mixed vegetables jar then bathed her then gave her 5oz. She drank all 5oz then she fell asleep. Laid on my chest. She has not done that in weeks. I enjoyed it. I laid her in her bed and within’ 15 minutes she was crying so I put her back in my bed. She settled but not to sleep. So I put on Frozen on the iPad and surprisingly she watched 3/4 of it before falling asleep. She was entranced whenever there was a song on there. She does love it when I sing to her and that is saying something because I cannot sing for shit.

She has been in her bed for about an hour or so now. I went into her room and tossed all her too-small clothes into a box for storing (for future babies). Mostly threw in newborn and 0-1 months because a lot of her 0-3 still fits but there was a small handful of 0-3. I have now moved her 3-6m stuff into her drawers so I can keep trying stuff on as some just about fits and some is too big. Different stores, different sizes. Asda’s stuff is always huge but Morrison’s and Sainsbury’s is usually a decent fit. She wore 3-6m the other day and it wasn’t too bad. The leggings were long but socks solve that problem. And the sleeves needed rolling back slightly.

I am off to sleep now as being at Brett’s always knackers me because I never sleep that good in other people’s houses.



I want a camera. For my birthday. In August. I decided this when I started looking at flying off to Italy for my birthday in 3 months. I have since reserved rooms in various hotels. One in Verona, Venice, Naples and Rome. All I need is my holiday form back, signed, to confirm I can go then next month I’ll book the flights and trains etc. Trains I could always book online using my iPad at one of the hotels as they all have free wifi. It was something I clicked as “must have” when searching for a room in each city. I know it seems silly but I want to be able to upload each day’s worth of photos otherwise I’ll be spending hours when I’m back home trying to upload it all. Also, if I want to message home etc then I can use the wifi to send facebook or whatsapp messages. I’m bound to feel a little homesick as I’ve never been abroad alone. I’m looking forward to it, providing it does happen!!!

I was late to work yesterday because I woke up with 5 minutes to leaving time to catch the bus. I had to decide what I could do in that time frame and I just about made it by getting dressed (quickly), brushing my teeth and having a wee. I didn’t even let the dog out for a wee or feed her. I made it in time for the bus. Got to town and realised I’d left my hair stuff at home a as well as my purse so I text work acting I was late and then I went back home to pick it all up. I got back to town and as the bus wasn’t coming for 35 minutes I decided to have breakfast so I ran round to McDonald’s. I finally got to work at 9, an hour late. My manager was cool about it though because I had forewarned her and kept her in the loop and that’s all she asks for. I went to the cinema after work to watch Big Game. Samuel L Jackson should’ve been a badass motherfucker but he wasn’t and it was a shame.

I went to the cinema tonight after work. I watched Spooks: The Greater Good. It was good and I thoroughly enjoyed it. I brought a slushie like usual but I spiked it with cranberry Smirnoff. After the cinema I got the bus to my Nan’s then mom took me for some dinner as I hadn’t eaten yet.

I haven’t been home long and I’m currently laid on my bed deciding whether or not to go to sleep as its 11 and I’m shattered.

Mom and I are off to the cinema tomorrow to watch The Age of Adaline then the twins are being dropped off as my aunt has things she needs to do around the house and asked if I’d have them. I don’t mind I suppose as they’re older so they can do things for themselves. I remember when they were babies and I had to tandem feed. One bottle per hand in each babies mouth. God that seems so long ago yet it was only 2 years. Where has time gone?