How is it March?

Monday wasn’t as bad as I expected. The problem being home extra days with Scarlett is sometimes it’s hard to return to work. But I must admit, I thrive on routine so going back to work was fine. She woke up by herself instead of me waking her so she was happy as larry. She had some toast whilst I made my lunch then I headed out after my Nan turned up.

Wasn’t surprised by my lack of emails when I got in. I had kept up with them till Friday afternoon and no one typically works a weekend so nada! They picked up a bit as the day went on.

I decided that today was the day I would tell Brett I wanted to finish with him. It’s not that I don’t love him, it’s just we are two very different people than we were 2 years ago. A lot has changed, for me personally, and when we split in December it was for a number of reasons. And these reasons have not changed. Obviously he is hurt. He doesn’t want this. He thinks we can figure it out. But he’s trying to accept my decision. He wants to remain friends for Scarlett’s sake and right now I see no reason why we can’t.

Scarlett had a good day at Nursery but it was her first day back after 4 days off and it was a long session so it wiped her out. She was a bit grumpy. She cheered up when she FaceTimed Brett. I put her in the bath then did her milk. I put her to bed at 7:15 but she didn’t settle even after we’d watched some TV and had dinner so I went up and climbed in her cot. Where my eyes are sore and watery, she thought I was crying. She rubbed my face and said “no cry mama”. Then she slipped her arms around my neck and gave me lots of cuddles. Plus some kisses. Which she actually named before she did it. She is growing too quickly! But I love it.

I climbed back out of her cot and she went to sleep. I guess she just needed some 1-to-1 time with me. I watched TV with mom then we went up to bed at like 11ish. My eye was proper throbbing and watering so badly.

Today my eye was glued shut when I woke up. I slept alright but my head still hurt a little. My mom heard Scarlett and as she was dressed before me said she’d get her up. But Scarlett wouldn’t get dressed until she had seen me. She was checking I was alright, bless her! I made my lunch then we left. We dropped her at my Nan’s then mom dropped me at work. I feel really cold today. Like I can’t get warm. I’ve had my heater on most of the day, only occasionally turning it off.

I called my doctor’s surgery earlier for a telephone appointment. I don’t know if some of my symptoms are normal for my coil. So the doc called back and said she wants the doctor who fitted it in May to see me. She will probably check it’s still in the right place. They may even have to do a blood test to check my hormone levels. We’ll see.

I am on lunch break now. Just going to watch Lucifer whilst I eat.