5 months in

So we didn’t end up going to Godstone farm on Saturday :(

Saturday 29th:

I woke up in the early hours after tossing and turning all night. I felt sick. Scarlett had woken up because she had a dirty nappy. My stomach was already turning and the smell didn’t help. By the grace of god I managed to change her without hurling but I knew I was seconds from doing so, so I slammed the stair gate shut and pegged it into the toilet. I tried to shut Scarlett out but she was right behind me, hanging off my legs. I was sick. I cleared up and turned round. She was giving me the most judgmental look. I was like “it isn’t self inflicted this time”. I went into the bathroom to wash up, brush my teeth etc and I was sick again. This time there was blood. I won’t lie, it did freak me out a bit and it brought back memories of what I was newly pregnant. I ended up in hospital for 3 days because I coughed up blood. My throat was sore from being sick so quickly so I assumed I had damaged my throat – hence the blood. I woke my mom up so she could take over with Scarlett. She sorted her a bottle then put her back down for a nap. I went back to bed.

I woke up about 10ish and I felt better, surprisingly. I avoided having any food. I just had some water. My mom said she planned to take Scarlett out as planned but not to Godstone Farm. She said she was going to take her to a nearer one so we got ready and went to the Trilakes nearby. Apart from being exhausted and not feeling able to walk too much without sitting down, we had a good afternoon. Scarlett loved looking at everything and we even managed to convince her to feed the goats.


We went to my nan’s after for a cuppa tea and then we went home. Scarlett had dinner, bath and went to bed. I had my dinner and then after I watched Riverdale on my iPad I went to bed. Must’ve fell asleep by about 9pm [fitbit says so].

Sunday 30th:

We were going out so we got up and had breakfast. Scarlett was cleaned up [messy breakfast] then I dressed her. We got in the car and off we went. It took us 90 minutes to get to East Grinstead. Not too bad. We were going to this bus thing. My mom’s boyfriend loves old buses and stuff, and they do these “shows”, where you can get on one [free of charge] and ride it there and back. Scarlett did really well with them but as mom had told me not to bring the stroller, she was tired after she had her lunch in the cafe. Usually I would walk her round for a bit whilst she slept and I couldn’t. Next time I will do that. She did really well though. We went on a total of 5 buses [I think].


We went to the Wetherspoons for dinner. I had a hotdog and chips, with cheesy garlic bread. Scarlett shared my dinner, plus she had her fruit. She was SHATTERED! I changed her nappy before we got back in the car to head home. She was flat out snoring 10 minutes after we set off. She slept for over an hour. It was a danger nap [past 5pm] but it is a weekend, I don’t mind. I don’t see her much in the week because of working, and her going to bed at 7pm.

Monday 1st May:

So it is May. Where has the last 5 months gone? I feel like I have blanked and boom, almost half way through the year. I would say time flies when you’re having fun but I haven’t been in the best place recently to agree.

Scarlett got up at a normal time. She had a bottle, then played for a bit. Then she had some breakfast. I put her down for a nap shortly after and whilst she napped I watched some NCIS. When she got up we put our shoes on and headed out. We were going for dinner with my grandparents and it was 11:15 when she woke so I figured we might as well go round early, and she can play. So we did.

We went for dinner at 1ish. We went to the Harvester. Scarlett did really well considering she usually has her lunch at 12-12:30. She had cucumber, sweetcorn and bacon bits from the salad bar. Then she had cheesy garlic bread [deffo my kid] which was mine that I shared. She had char-grilled chicken strips with chips and peas for her main. She ate all the peas, some chicken and a few chips. She did so well. For someone so small she eats so well. After the harvester we nipped into Morrison’s and she wandered with my nan whilst I grabbed some bits. I got her some summery bits for our holidays. It will be hot in Italy, in the height of August, and it MAY be warm in July – we will have to see.

I am back to work tomorrow. I hate that Saturday felt like a write-off because I wasn’t well. We are off Friday because we are going to the Harry Potter studio tour in London. I went in 2014 and it was fab. They have changed a lot and added a lot to it so I am excited for that.

TTFN x

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